When I use the word “lush”, I’m not talking about foliage. I heard a news report last night about the “average American”, and among the interesting little factoids shared, a few stood out.
Americans spent $155 billion dollars last year on alcohol.
I’m not saying we bring back Prohibition or anything, but come on people! $155 billion!? Isn’ that the GNP of some Third World countries? I did a google image search for “drunken idiots”+funny, and this picture popped up:
Make no mistake, that little girl is clearly screaming in outrage over our ridiculous consumption of alcohol, not because the starving water buffalo just ate her little brother. Of course, your callous indifference to her plight would drive her to drink, but she’s too dirt poor to afford alcohol.
And if that weren’t bad enough, compound it with these factoids…
2. & 3. The average American works out 17 minutes a day, and spends 3 hours watching TV.
Do we really need to look any further to discover the reason for our absurd levels of obesity? Honestly, how hard is it to do some crunches, pushups, or dips while watching the boobtube? Drop and give me 20 ya fat slobs!
Now if you’ll excuse me, there’s a water buffalo I have to headbutt into submission for someone.